the long silences bother me too, but they aren’t intentional

Since Game of Thrones is still a few weeks away from airing, my Sunday nights tend to end on watching the weirdly contentious “Girls” each week.  Last night was a funny episode — Hannah (finally) gets a real job, but one working in the advertisement section of a prestigious magazine on behalf of a major retailer (it’s given the obnoxious name of the “advertorial department” which is deeply upsetting to me, even as someone who loves a fine portmanteau).  She finds out rapidly that 1) There are a lot of perks for working in a corporate environment, beyond just health care and a somewhat liveable wage, 2) she’s actually quite good at this job, which is geared towards her certain brand of observational quirkiness and kind of tempting after the major career setback she just faced 3) She could really get stuck in this job and lose all her creative energy to do anything else.  The last is a realization that almost drives her to quit and definitely drives her to cry at her desk.  And here’s what hit home at the end of the episode — when she’s decided to keep the job anyway and try to maintain the balance of paying her bills and continuing to write — she goes home at the end of the day, full of plans and hopes, telling her boyfriend that “I am going to write three hours a night when I get home everyday!” and then conks out on the couch, because she’s drained.

Anyway, that’s almost my excuse, too.  Get home from work, make dinner, suddenly it’s almost 9 and the night is toast becauseI have to be up at 5:30 anyway, so why not watch some HGTV, do the chores I have to do, and fall asleep saying “Soon, I’ll settle into a schedule where I can…” insert creative outlet here.  But that IS what happens, and it’s hard to break out of it.

Normally I’d issue a self-challenge here, but I’m just so drained today and I want to get up early to hit the gym, so, peace out.


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