Just got back from a bike ride. The air is temperate and fresh after today’s thunderstorms, so I figured I’d take The Admiral out for an evening ride in the park just above my apartment. Fewer bitchy comments aimed at you when you exercise outside, although I have to deal with my other pet peeve: walkers in the bike path. It’s not ever just one person, either. It always turns out to be a crowd of people, walking five abreast, each one having missed the many signs indicating that this one is for biking and that one is for walking. The best part is when people act annoyed with me when I use my bell to alert them that I am coming up behind them, and perhaps they would like to collect their children and dachsunds so that they won’t get entangled in my wheels?
The worst are the geese. I get chased by them all the time on my bike, and it’s never not terrifying. First the hiss, then the chase, then me wondering if this is the time I bump over a stump, fall off my bike and meet a feathery demise. Why wasn’t I being more careful?
I guess it could be worse. On a trail near my parents’ house, there is a sign declaring that everyone should be advised as there is a “Bear In the Area.” I biked there over the Fourth and did not encounter the bear, but I wouldn’t be surprised if I had. That said, he probably wouldn’t have chased me like the geese do, because bears are more likely to leave you alone unless they are angry, hungry, or you are a menstruating female who happens to have a snickers on you. Geese are bent on revenge. They know how pâté is made, and they are pissed.
I’ve also encountered some turkeys lately, but they mostly dart off because they don’t care for power. And if they dare give me any guff, I’m going to come at them shouting, “Bring it, bird! I ate a YOU SANDWICH today, with cranberry chutney!”
Nutty Bananacakes 